"Thomas Jefferson would greet heads of state in hi...

2009-03-10T20:53:00.000-05:00

"Thomas Jefferson would greet heads of state in his bathrobe--drop that one on those people and see what they say."

See what they say?! See what they say?! Are you effin' serious dude? I'll tell you what they'll say! They'll say, "Holy shit Mr. President, put your bathrobe back on!"

My goodness man, have you lost your senses, or is this some bizzaro presidential fantasy thing you're playing out for the horror of the rest of us? Why in the world would we want a serial bathrobe dropper in the oval office? I mean we had a dress stainer not so long ago and I think we all know how that turned out.

And what about the lovely Michelle? How is she supposed to take all of this robe dropping while on duty. I mean hey, if I had access to historical rooms you can bet we'd be doing it everywhere, and I suppose they are. MORE POWER TO 'EM! But dude, man, come on, if she catches our man dropping the robe with Angie Merkel, or maybe that hottie from Argentina there's gonna be hell to pay! Ever get a look at those guns the first lady is sporting?! Man, she could do some real damage, like a black eye or something!

And then what'll we do?! You think that little Iranian freak won't notice Barack's black eye? You think he won't think, "Man that guy got beat up by a chick! I'm gonna nuke the Jews! Dude's got nuthin'"

So we can't have that. I mean ok, that Chinese fella would probably be a little intimidated if you know what I mean. But that's it. Otherwise it's total disaster! So please, be careful what you suggest. Barack is new to this stuff and I know you mean well, but we gotta be careful cuz he ain't too experienced.

Love the dining room, but where's the table? Did you have to burn it for heat? Times is bad man, times is bad.

Comments on Shoryland: Dear President Obama:

"Thomas Jefferson would greet heads of state in hi...